I think I'll stick to trying not to post, keeping it short when I do and only freely allowing myself to post when something has managed to lift my mood long enough to log onto livejournal.
I would call this a livejournal hiatus, but I'm not really strong enough for that and I've been here since I was 13, so I won't call it that. I'm not sure what this is.
I want the old me back in my head. =( I know she would crack a joke right now, and I'd be laughing away at myself alone in my room, not caring that I appeared crazy - because it would be good crazy, the kind of crazy that copes and cleans herself and leaves bed, and not this. I hate when the voice I consider 'me' leaves, but then I'm still here, only who does that make me if I don't recognise myself?
UGHSTOPITKIWI. You wanted to be less depressing, remember?
You all are completely forgiven for not commenting on any of my entries. I wouldn't know what to say either. Edited: No, no, that didn't come out right! I was trying to think of the right word but I couldn't and forgiven was close but now I realise it makes it sound as though I'm accusing you all of not commenting on past entries, which isn't true, you've all been fantastic with commenting and I only meant that you all are sort of forgiven-in-advance, off the hook I mean, with commenting on future entries. Because I will completely understand not having anything to say / the right thing to say / a comfortable thing to say - I've totally been there. Dark entries are hard to respond to, so I wanted to make sure that none of you feel pressured into it or guilty at all if you can't/don't want to comment! Only I went and said pretty much the exact opposite. I'm sorry. =(
A woman is like a teabag. You never know how strong she is until she gets into hot water.