I can't believe this is my 2k post. I'm a little bit shocked, but in a good way. I can't believe I've been on this one journal for half a decade now. It's incredible to me. This journal and I have been through so much!
I'm finishing up my literature review. Have all the research/quotes plugged in now, just tightening it up and explaining...then comes the trickier part of cutting out half of it, since it's supposed to be ~3,500 and I'll probably end up at ~7,000. Keeping the cut bits, though, so no fears. (:
Work crush has a boyfriend in her home state PE. I don't know if it's that I just don't fall hard enough, or am not 'doing it right', but I never get that agonising feeling. In fact, when I heard her say 'my boyfriend' and look so happy, my heart just sang for her. I like her: she's intelligent, attractive, fun, peaceful, silly and fantastic. I'm thrilled that she's found someone who makes her happy! I guess I'm a little confused over where the sense of agony that that person isn't me comes from. I'm still going to enjoy the work crush to the fullest. (: Possibly even more now, given that my mind won't be filled with 'what if...?'s!
I made it through my first day of camp. I didn't have to scream. I laughed often. I ran around a bit. I saw a deer. I witnessed five boys singing Lady Gaga's 'Telephone'. I was given a goose feather. I was well-liked by the campers. (Normally don't like that many 'I' sentences, but I saw the pattern and stuck with it. :P)
This seems like a good 2k post to sum me up. Perhaps it should have been a Pride post, but this is where I'm at right now, so I'll go with it. Plus the fact that I have a huge deadline in a few hours and am working diligently (save this moment) toward it without freaking out makes me feel really good, like I'm getting somewhere with my life. Less about the dissertation/degree and more with the knowledge that I am presently facing one of my biggest fears and I'm doing okay - far better than I ever expected.
Plus when I was taking my 'head space' half-hour at Stony Brook after camp, Dragonfly stopped at her car and had a conversation to check in with me. (: And promised that we will definitely have to eat ice cream some day after camp, since she mentioned it to all the counsellors and there was little we wanted more than ice cream after a hot day. :P