Kiwi Crocus (cranky__crocus) wrote,
Kiwi Crocus
cranky__crocus

Spawn.

There was lots of drama today with Lauren and Sunny.

It made me wonder. It's seemed to me for quite a while that many of the people who end up in relationships are the ones that can't handle it so well. That it's often out of a need to not be single, or a need to get with anyone who is interested, or a need to do what everyone else is doing.

A lot of the people I've seen around who would do well in a relationship are the ones who gently decline. Prioritising life things. Hayls took pretty much a whole term to decide she really did want to date Andrew, and they're doing quite well. From my observations, it seems a lot of the people best suited and most prepared to be in a relationship are those who are also secure with being single and will make the conscious choice to join the relationship in good time, with good communication and integrity and the lot of that.

I did a lot of revising today. Ben was 'round to check on Lauren. He called her "a huge geek" jokingly and I said, "Oh no, what does that make me?" He strolled over to my room and said, "It makes you Kiwi!" I reported that that's what everyone said--it's the equation of my idiosyncrasies to my definition being "Kiwi." He chuckled and said I didn't fit in any role or group.

He asked me if I wanted to have children. I told him yes, and expressed my plan: it's not coming out of me (at this point I really do not have a child-bearing body) but I would not object to one genetic child, other than that adoption pleases me. He asked if I'd be asking my partner to do it for me. I smiled and said if I had a partner and she wanted to, sure; if I had multiple partners and we wanted kids together, sure; if I have no partner and feel I'm ready I'm on my own, there it is, then. He wants children late 20s. In my current feel of life (not plan, I don't really keep those) it seems mine will be later. I wouldn't object to in my 40s, either. Whenever feels right. He thought that was neat. He told me he thought I would be a good mother and would teach the right kind of values. It made me smile. He enjoyed the idea of my eventually (far eventually) having a settled house that is constantly brimming with life, as I expressed. Possibly foster kids and whatever homeless teens come through town, whatever friends need beds or whoever needs a home of some sort for a while. Depends on my level of success, I would suppose, laughter. Although I would think eventually I will have enough for a home of my own, smiles. I picture it a lot like the house in Maine. Peculiar.

So I thought of that quite a bit. Hung out with Hayls while we were revising in my room. I had a promptless laugh attack. I was just revising and suddenly everything in the world was funny and I was on the floor giggling up a storm. Hayls was particularly amused. I love laugh attacks. I find them to be great fun and really put a positive spin on everything.

I finished my lectures tonight. Which means I soon go to sleep and wake up tomorrow ready to read through all my mammals stuff for the exam on Wednesday.

Free time approaches more every day! Great big smile.
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