May 26th, 2011

Rainbow || Rainbow northern lights.

(no subject)

I'm ill.

I've been battling through my five stages of illness!grief.

Denial: This is my longest state. I excel at it, really. It isn't even "no, I feel fine"; there is no acknowledgement whatsoever that I could be ill. Surprising symptoms will get by without notice. I hold tightly to this stage. Once it is finally ripped from me, however, I tend to get through the others relatively quickly.

Anger: "Oh for frak's sake! Body, you win another Inconvenient Timing award. I just booked my ticket for a weekend of travel. Auuuugh."

Bargaining: "Can't you just go away for a week, please? I'll have sent my brother off Stateside and will be into my month of June, doing nothing. I can afford to be sick then. Please?"

Depression: "*Sigh.* Nope, I'm stuck with it. I'm ill. There's hardly a point in leaving bed, is there? Except that I can't seem to sleep a wink. All my events are going to be terrible and I'm going to ruin everyone's good time. Rain cloud over my head, do you have any silver lining?"

Acceptance: "Well, I suppose if I'm actually ill with some sore throat lurgy, it is the perfect excuse to eat soup and ice cream. Might as well leave bed since I'm not sleeping. Oh, it's before noon! Means I certainly haven't got enough sleep, but I can try napping later...and now I have more time! Tissues, where are you...?"

This morning I heard Roberts coughing; I believe I have just heard him sneeze twice. I asked him (through my door), "Roberts, are you ill?" "No, I have an exam this afternoon." "And you aren't ill?" "No, I'm fine. ...are you?" I think he may be in the first stage, somehow...

It was also doomed to happen. I was in a house with an afflicted man and between the six boys with whom I share a house, there isn't much hygiene to go around (beyond personal showering, and sometimes not even that). I'll take great care with my own hygiene during my travels.

While in my own room, I'm just going to be a bit of a slob - counter-productive, since I was meant to be cleaning my room. Ah well!

Now I'm going to go nurse myself with a bowl of soup and enjoy a little escapism! I'm thinking Mädchen in Uniform. (: (Thanks tetleythesecond!)


They say goldfish have no memory; I guess their lives are much like mine and the little plastic castle is a surprise every time. And it's hard to say if they're happy but they don't seem much to mind.
[Ani DiFranco; Little Plastic Castle]
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