December 14th, 2010

Rainbow || Rainbow northern lights.

(no subject)

It's 6sm [eta: 6 'sm' is apparently 6 'stupidly awake' in 6am typo language].

Today I have finished my section + another section of my group presentation, written my notes for that presentation, worked on my part of the handout, written my handout for my other presentation, finished my leaflet & emailed it off with questions (to get a lovely response from my professor saying she'd be glad to help if I'm a little patient - which do course I will be :D) and done a load of laundry.

It doesn't seem quite productive enough, but it is some productivity, which is good.

It means that the only real thing between me and home is a 2,000 word research paper, giving the actual presentations and dissertation reading.

I have 3 days for the paper and 4-5 days for the reading of my dissertation books. Totally doable since I would ordinarily confine the activities to two evenings.

But still frightening. And I'll still procrastinate, because *waves hand*, hi I'm me.

But now it is time for a 4 hour nap before I head on campus for a group meeting. Tomorrow (well, today) is a new day.

Pfft. And this is how I choose to lead my life. :B I am a silly person.
Rainbow || Rainbow northern lights.

(no subject)

Just so you know, my dear Friends of Fandom, 'brazen' is's word of the day.

You just think about what images that brings to mind, hmm?

Huzzaaaaaah for older lesbians of the Harry Potter world! ♥

It's almost 4. I made it through my meeting. I went out on a date with myself at Mojos and treated myself to propper food. I'll take the safety bus home. But ooooh until I am home, I am NOT thinking about work!

La la la la I can't hear you la la la laaaaa!!

Wow I totally just took my icon in a completely different context. Oh, the state of my mind today. No waaai.
  • Current Music
    Salt n Pepa - Push It
Rainbow || Rainbow northern lights.

(no subject)

So, free-verse poetry really isn't my thing. But I was in this huge Space and I needed an outlet.

You know those moments where it feels as though nothing is really happening, nothing important you can get under your thumb, but you feel it, that slow and steady build of change, that build that may at once become an earthquake somewhere down the line? I don't study geo-whatever and tectonic plates and earthquakes, but I believe they have little quivers that alert they may be coming. My life is quivering in that fine-tuned, easy-to-miss-if-too-busy way and today I took the time to go on a self-date and spend a few hours specifically not acknowledging work anywhere in my mind. Today I felt the quivering and it made me want to cry, not for sadness (for I am not sad, or at least, not wholly: it's a meld of mixed emotions); they feel like transitional tears: the tears that mark the entrance into or presence of transition.

I am transitioning. I needed to get it out, somehow. I wrote this. It's meant to be simple and repetitive but with the hint of something new on the horizon, still enveloped in what is known and (usually) loved (but sometimes peevishly accepted, as many loved things are) and comfortable. No particular syntax or syllable count, rhyme scheme...nothing rigid. I wanted it free. I picture it with finger-picked ukulele soft in the background, softly spoken-sung and whispered. Here goes.

Kiwi dreams
Kiwi dreams of dancing,
Dancing under the milky way;
She dreams of dancing through a meadow of singing flowers.
Kiwi dreams it,
She dreams it...
But she is not sleeping, is she?
No, she is not sleeping--
Not sleeping at all...

And I am Kiwi,
Oh I am Kiwi,
Though sometimes I'm not so sure
Not so sure I'm her at all:
Identity's not so pure.

It's winter
It's winter in this hemisphere
In this hemisphere there are snowy smiles
This hemisphere has fairy lights and snow
It's winter,
Oh winter...
No more student winters, are there?
No, no more student winters--
No more college fairy lights...

And I love winter,
Oh I love winter,
Though sometimes I'm not so sure
Not so sure I love it all.
Though the snow's so pure,
The snow's so pure,
So pure so pure.

The snow, it's so pure
Falling from the sky in this hemisphere
Betwixt the fairy lights and smiles
Gifts and laughs, love and miles
It falls over the flowers
The singing flowers
In the meadow under the milky way
And Kiwi is dancing,
Dancing there in dreams beneath the milky way.
She wishes she might, wishes she may
Get to sleep again
Amongst the winter flowers and snow
So she may know, oh she may know
She is done and home.

And I am Kiwi,
Oh I am Kiwi,
Though sometimes I'm not so sure
Not so sure I'm her at all:
Identity's not so pure.
But the snow is falling pure
And I am coming home.
  • Current Music
    Imaginary Snow