July 8th, 2010

Rainbow || Rainbow northern lights.

(no subject)

Having Jo was lovely and I think she had a fantastic time. We saw most of my close friends, got to some of my favourite places and created some quality memories.

Maine was beautiful, as always. We saw a bald eagle on the 4th of July. It was pretty hilarious - I've never been that patriotic, so America seems to have given up and produced the phenomenon himself. (The eagle was sitting and thinking predatory thoughts, of course, rather than doing any nationalist jig...)

This week of camp has been hot and hectic but overall not too bad. I have the best three campers ever. Today we chopped down some Japanese Knotweed; yesterday we went 'streaming' (walking through a stream). Tomorrow is Friday, so ice cream in a bag, and then off with McSpleeny and the ol' high school friends.

Today I had Val over. We coloured together and plucked at our ukuleles a bit. Caught up on each other’s lives (as in, I caught up on his; I don't have a life). Discussed old and new Aggie. I drew him an 'I Am Special' award of 'Daring Dinosaur'. He was ecstatic. We parted ways.

I was relaxing in the loo when the home phone rang. I was startled by its continued existence (people still have those?) but otherwise took no notice. Mother came barging toward the mudroom hollering that it was from me. I rolled my eyes. She told me it was Mrs. Cavanagh right before reporting, "She's in the bathroom, she'll be out in a second" and talking about Mrs. Cav's first name, Deborah. All the while also on the phone with my uncle.

Mrs. Cav was confused; she thought my mother had been a friend of mine. When I corrected her, everything fell into place. We firmed up a plan for the 17th. I did reasonably with keeping my tongue in order with my mind. Told her I'd check with mother if I would have a car available as 'we have four adult drivers and two cars - doesn't add up to always having a car available' ('no, it wouldn't!'). Mum then started an incredibly silly conversation that ended with Mrs. Cav asking in my ear, 'May I be put on the phone with your mother?'

Some of the things that escaped were "Yes, Deborah, like Deb, but with a bra!", laughter and "shut up!" followed by "no, not you, my idiot brother". It would all have been fairly entertaining had I been able to take a step to the left and knock myself out of my funk. I was just so taken aback by THE MOST UNEXPECTED TIMING EVER in combination with a ridiculous amount of life!gunk.

When I took the phone back I must have groaned something and she responded almost hesitantly, "You know, she's not a reflection on you..." and I felt suddenly 16 again, as though all this growth I was trying to prove through meeting had deflated and left me back at where I started. The rest of my conversation was flustered and frazzled, but I confirmed the plans and sent a text so she'd have my number. So. 11 am, 17th, Crackerbarrel. It's real. Interesting.

Frustrations: feeling I've regressed in personal growth; not being able to play ukulele/sing when others are around and can hear me; personal moon cycles; exhaustion; not wanting to sleep.

However, Boy Meets World has cured most of this, and now I just want to have a giant water fight. Camp reminds me that it's acceptable for me to regress to younger ages as long as I do it responsibly. No one (not Mrs. Cav or anyone else) wants me to be anyone but myself.

P.S. I never want to be that surprised in my life ever again. I almost fell into the bathtub.
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