April 10th, 2007

Rainbow || Rainbow northern lights.

Loooong entry.

I was reading through old entries and I realized that I really like when I used to write long entries 'cause it was great to go back and read them.

So I'll try a short and long version of the day, el-jay-cutting the longer bit.

Edited before post: It's VERY long. But if you've been looking for that long Kiwi-reveals-everything post? This is it. Prepare yourself properly, then. =). It could be an interesting read. You never know how you'll relate.

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The short version doesn't really compare, but here it goes:

I hate alarm clocks. They stink. Mrs. Green? Total pab, seriously. Accidentally took Pantaxi's seat with my wheel chair.

Didn't sit with Dana and Lindsay, since Bethaloupe was behind them in an empty seat and they had suggested it. I had a bad feeling but did it anyway, knowing I would enjoy a seat with Beth. Moments later they were kicked off the bus and put onto another bus to fit Mrs. Green, one seat in front of me.

The giant room with so many people made me sick. Didn't look at any colleges. Social anxiety flared up. So many unkind eyes. I hated it. McDonald's was yuck and cried all the way home. Ignored Bethaloupe and guilt ate at me. She was showing she cared... I just couldn't. Couldn't anything. Had to be within. After McDonald's, came back out. Joined the world. Joined Bethaloupe.

Believe that if I had gone to another school I would be able to handle AP courses. I'm smart, I learn quickly, I know how to ask for help, and I have the drive. Glad I came to my school anyway. Love Mrs. Cav.

Wanted to talk to Hitomi all day. Never know which one I'll end up with--happyzippy anime fan that is wonderful and neat and special but not the one I connect with most, the depressed girl who is saddened by the world and obstacles whom I completely click with but don't always know how to be with, or the Hitomi somehow I feel I "know" even though I don't completely. The Hitomi I wanted to kiss so many years ago. The Hitomi I can talk to for hours without the slightest speck of anything boredom related. I love them all, but the last is the one I connect with best. (Sorry if that is too honest for you, love, but know that I adore you however you are and any other Hitomis there are to come--I promise.) So now that I have my license I'm sure we'll see each other some time soon.

Excited for next year too.
  • Current Music
    Melissa Ferrick -- I'm a Lesbian. (Silllllly.)
Rainbow || Rainbow northern lights.

(no subject)

Comment and I will...

1 - Tell you why I friended you.
2 - Associate you with something. A fandom, a song, a colour, a piece of fruit. SOMETHING.
3 - Tell you something I like about you.
4 - Tell you a memory I have of you.
5 - Associate you with a character/pairing.
6 - Ask something I've always wanted to know about you.
7 - Tell you my favorite user pic of yours.
8 - In retort, you must spread this disease in your LJ.

At the moment I'm going to bed, though.

Oh, oh oh! I got a spifftastic SILLY HAT!! <3. Silly as in an elderly woman would probably wear it.

But it's very Kiwish.

I wish I had a camera.

I wonder if Mum will let me wear it to school tomorrow. It's a very expensive hat.

But why have a hat if one won't use it?

Seems rather ridiculous to me.