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24 July 2011 @ 09:16 pm
My new ship  
My friends,

After the wonderful slash panel at DiaCon today, I have decided to give up writing femslash and turn my writing talents to Harry/Draco. The slashers on the panel were so very convincing, and the movie even more so!

I'm sorry if this upsets any of my flist, but the sexual tension between Harry and Draco cannot be denied, and I simply must explore it.

Under the cut, you'll find my first attempt at a fic for my new OTP. Please tell me what you think!



Photobucket

Someone forgot to sign out of their LJ! *runs away giggling*
 
 
Current Mood: excitedexcited
 
 
 
Kiwi Crocuscranky__crocus on July 24th, 2011 08:22 pm (UTC)
Well done, featherxquill, well done.

Someone has proven she truly belongs in Slytherin!

P.S. Hah, queen_of_snapes, I beat you! My brain may not be as quick as a Ravenclaw's at the moment, but my fingers are.

Edited at 2011-07-24 08:23 pm (UTC)
Feather Quill: Pancakefeatherxquill on July 24th, 2011 08:27 pm (UTC)
I know nothing! *innocent smile*

It's all Peeves' fault.
Kiwi Crocuscranky__crocus on July 24th, 2011 08:30 pm (UTC)
It's all Peeves' fault.
That's what they all say. I'm sure even McGonagall has used that one, when she and [insert female character here] weren't careful and the gnomes found her toys on the table...

Oh goodness my brain is terrible today. I blame queen_of_snapes and the banana.

(Also, glad someone got to use the apple icon! :D)
President Airlockqueen_of_snapes on July 24th, 2011 08:22 pm (UTC)
I wonder if there will be bananas involved at some point...
Kiwi Crocuscranky__crocus on July 24th, 2011 08:25 pm (UTC)
I swear I did not do anything inappropriate with a banana! I only killed it. That's mildly inappropriate next to your allegation!

(But, yes, if I were to write H/D, there would probably be a banana or two involved. At least, that's what I would have to pretend was in their pants...

Still, I prefer the Trelawney/Banana/McGonagall scenario, personally. It's not femslash--it's fruitslash.)
minervas_eule: Stopminervas_eule on July 24th, 2011 09:15 pm (UTC)
featherxquill: Detention to write "I may not take over somebody elses identity on LJ" 50 times! Gee, you gave me quite a shock ;-))
therealsnape: SS OMGWTFtherealsnape on July 24th, 2011 09:42 pm (UTC)
You really had me there for a moment!

featherxquill, you're too much! Loved meeting you. Whenever we meet again, I will log off religiously and hold on to all my luggage. You Rita, you!

And what was that about a banana? Kiwi?
kellychambliss: HagridPornkellychambliss on July 24th, 2011 09:50 pm (UTC)
A lock of white-blond hair skimming his cheek, Draco looked down at Harry, who was spread-eagled on the bed. The Malfoy-patrician nostrils flared, and Harry thought he had never seen anything so erotic in his life. Not even seeing Snape's undies in a pensieve could hold a candle to the sexy shimmer of Draco's nose hair.

Draco knew exactly what effect he was having on the Boy Who Had a Nose-Hair Kink, and very deliberately, he exhaled again.


Wow, Kiwi, this is brilliant. So glad you switched to H/D, where you obviously belong.

Edited at 2011-07-24 09:51 pm (UTC)
lash_larue: Monkey/Owllash_larue on July 24th, 2011 10:22 pm (UTC)
Put-the-wine-down...

Lash reached for the bottle...
L
therealsnape: zzz crones cottagetherealsnape on July 24th, 2011 10:42 pm (UTC)
We obey you religiously.

The bottle's empty anyhow.

Kelly is now rincing the glasses, to fill them with liquor.
Kiwi Crocuscranky__crocus on September 5th, 2011 06:10 am (UTC)
You have a real knack for this, you know? I think I'll get a good galleon if I'm able to convert you to the dark side.

(The dark side is Draco's pants.)

I'm very impressed by your nose-hair!kink writing. Very impressed indeed.
Kiwi Crocus: Agnes Moorehead || Writing.cranky__crocus on October 14th, 2012 06:03 pm (UTC)
I was discussing with Zee and Lark about that time my Livejournal was yoinked by Feather and as I was opening it I remembered, "Oh, this is the post with Kelly nostril-hair fic!"

Lark, sensibly, uttered one word: "What?"

So I read it out loud to her. I thought she and Zee would die laughing. I then read the comments after, with Lash suggesting you put away the wine and TRS responding that of course you'd obey, but the bottle was already empty, and you were off to rinse the glasses in order to fill them with liquor ("rinsing spelled a c," I added).

Just wanted to let you know that we were revisiting past Coven experiences. (;
kellychambliss: Covenkellychambliss on October 14th, 2012 06:21 pm (UTC)
♥♥♥
lash_laruelash_larue on July 24th, 2011 10:20 pm (UTC)
Sweet, screaming Jesus...

I was actively trying to choose between euthansia and suicide.

I am not going to ask about the fruit. I am simply not going to do that.
L
Kiwi Crocuscranky__crocus on September 5th, 2011 06:12 am (UTC)
Euthanasia. Please, for the love of all that is Good and Holy and Certainly Not Harry Potter (the Actual Boy), always euthanasia. Promise me that; don't make me write up the papers for the court of law...

(I don't remember enough about the fruit. I just remember exclaiming at the breakfast table, "I had sex with a banana!" That was after I stabbed it with a knife. I'm not really a morning person; these things are hazy.)
Lakela: snapelakela on July 25th, 2011 06:01 am (UTC)
This was a rather unlikely post... LOL

However, I myself have turned over to the dark side. Even darker than Drarry, in fact, as my new OTP is Snape/Harry.
It's perfection made fanfiction. It's like icecream on a hot summer day. It's like femslash with guys. IT'S GOT NAKED SNAPE IN IT!

So... really, Drarry doesn't even sound as a half bad idea...
Kiwi Crocuscranky__crocus on September 5th, 2011 06:15 am (UTC)
This was a rather unlikely post... LOL
Conventions and Peeves-like friends will do that to a person.

Snarry was quite popular at the con we were at, actually--certainly much more common than any of my fandom corner's ships.

"Femslash with guys"? Thank you, but I think I'll avoid picturing that. I tend to prefer my femslash-sundae with women-cherries on top.

(Many ships can have naked Snape in them. I myself have enjoyed the occasional Snape/McGonagall, Snape/Flitwick and Snape/Dumbledore, alongside countless others that I can't recall.)

I would have to say that, for my life, Drarry does sound like a half-bad idea; it's probably more of a bad-and-a-half idea for me. Then, I'm known for writing 'coven fic', a coin termed for my fanfic about friendship and romance between the older female characters of Harry Potter. :D
Lakela: snapelakela on September 5th, 2011 08:06 am (UTC)
Oh hi you! long time no see :D

LOL

Oh no, the images you put in my head! I understand that Snape can be naked in many ships. Snape/Petunia for one. But DUMBLEDORE SHOULD NOT BE NAKED in ANY ship! Same goes for Flitwick. I could get behind McGonagall, but the other two are nonos.

This is the only Dumbledore/Snape story I may get behind: http://www.walkingtheplank.org/archive/viewstory.php?sid=2919 (read it! You know you want to! hehe)

"Femslash with guys"? Thank you, but I think I'll avoid picturing that. I tend to prefer my femslash-sundae with women-cherries on top. I get your point and would generally agree. However, it really IS like femslash with guys. ALL the authors are female and most of them are not straight. It reads just like femslash but with... things on the way. *g*

As for Drarry. The thing is, before Snarry I didn't much like Harry, or any of the younger characters for that matter. With Snarry I discovered Harry's potential as a character and because Draco features in many of those fics, to a certain point also Draco. (So, theoretically, I could get behind Drarry, but what's the point of a ship that doesn't have Snape in it? Hehe)
In any case, ANYTHING is better than Harry/Ginny. And I did think Harry/Draco had WAY more chemistry in the movie than Harry/Ginny will ever have...

What older female characters ARE there aside from McGonagall (who I agree, is absolute badass)?
Kiwi Crocuscranky__crocus on September 5th, 2011 08:26 am (UTC)
Yes, indeed, it has been a while! That's a sad fact! :X

("Walking the Plank"? Is that a website-name euphemism for hard-wood/penises?)

D'awr! I think Dumbledore and Flitwick could be quite dashing nude, to those characters who might find some romantic feelings there. If I can find a beautiful person instantly unattractive for the things she says/fails to say, I don't see why it couldn't work the other way for fictional characters who live to double our lifespans! Beauty is, after all, in the eye of the beholder. (;

I think most of the slash I come across is written by not-entirely-or-even-mostly straight females. Alas, that has never caught my fancy. Then, when I read slash, I tend to like it to read like slash--a bit differently than femslash, then, but not in manners I could actually list--so I get a little put off by slash-reading-as-femslash-with-penises. Plus, most of the femslash I read doesn't tend to have things attached. :B

...but what's the point of a ship that doesn't have Snape in it? Hehe
I think some of my friends might partially agree with you there. :Þ I'm afraid I'm still not much a fan of Harry, though I have found myself endeared to him in a few incredibly well-written stories. Ditto for Draco and a number of the other younger characters (though Luna has often been an exception). I can't say I'm a Harry/Ginny shipper, either...I generally don't think of the younger characters at all, really, save Luna and occasionally others (such as for my Luna/Pansy fest-fic).

The main seven I wrote about were Minerva McGonagall, Rolanda Hooch (Quidditch instructor--very dykey), Wilhelmina Grubbly-Plank (3rd-year Care of Magical Creatures substitute--also very dykey), Augusta Longbottom (Neville's grandmother--very feisty), Irma Pince (librarian), Poppy Pomfrey (nurse), Amelia Bones (Susan's aunt/Head of Magical Law Enforcement--very dykey, too). There's also Griselda Marchbanks (though I haven't written her, I don't think), Mafalda Hopkirk, Bathilda Bagshot and a few others that were mentioned.

Friendly interaction between them is now frequently called 'coven', romances/sex-sessions between them is often referred to as Old Lady Smut (hence my corner of fandom flying the Old Lady Smut Brigade flag) and romance/sex between them and others is generally awesome as well and also found in my corner of fandom.

Grey's Anatomy was kind of an anomaly for me, with my interest in the characters of those ages (though even Addison and Erica were in their 40s, I believe?). I tend to like the older, strong-but-sassy female characters.

I actually like that I have an appreciation for older characters (including Dumbledore, though I don't seek out nude fanfic of him personally); it makes me fear my own ageing less. I kind of love what ageing does to a lot of women. (Though I have to admit that, outside of the Harry Potter world where witches are middle-aged in their 70s, I would probably not read/write smutty fic about the over-80s crowd.)
Lakela: snapelakela on September 5th, 2011 08:54 am (UTC)
Oh dear, is that what Walking the Plank means?? Coming from the Pirates of the Caribbean fandom, I didn't really think twice about it. lol

Sad fact indeed :( I'm afraid neither of us has been around much! Are you all done universitycally speaking?

If I can find a beautiful person instantly unattractive for the things she says/fails to say, I don't see why it couldn't work the other way for fictional characters who live to double our lifespans! Beauty is, after all, in the eye of the beholder. (;
Whilst I agree, Dumbledore and Flitwick would not be those ppl for me. Flitwick because... I actually have to google him every time he comes up to make sure I know who they're talking about and I really, REALLY cannot see him with Snape of all ppl. (I promise to find out more about him now that the pottermore has sorted me in Ravenclaw, but still... with Snape? I really can't see it). As for Dumbledore, it's not so much an age thing (though I admit, over a 100 year olds might be a little too much for me)... he's just a very asexual character, IMO. (which is why I'm not crazy that this one is the one JKR decided to out as a homosexual...) I'm all for finding older ppl and unconventional beauties attractive (Snape and Petunia look like AR and Fiona Shaw in my mind, who are neither young nor conventionally pretty...) but there are characters I simply can't picture sexually. Truth be told, it might have to do with long beards.

I get a little put off by slash-reading-as-femslash-with-penises. Plus, most of the femslash I read doesn't tend to have things attached. :B
I was mostly joking about that. I never thought I would care about slash (WHERE is the FEMALE character?!?!) until I came across Pirates of the Caribbean and completely changed my mind. I would love to read slash written by men, though, just to see if it's any different.
(though many of the authors I've bothered to find out about, ARE, in fact, gay or bi)

Oh dear, where was I while I read Harry Potter? I hardly know ANY of these women! (I always wished Trelawney was a bit less of a nut case. She had such potential! I mean, she looked like Emma Thompson!)

Grey's Anatomy was kind of an anomaly for me, with my interest in the characters of those ages (though even Addison and Erica were in their 40s, I believe?). I tend to like the older, strong-but-sassy female characters.
That is where I came from, too. The love of my life is Katharine Hepburn and not just from when she was 20 ^_^ But I've surprised even myself as years go by, to find my tastes get broader and broader.
Kiwi Crocuscranky__crocus on September 5th, 2011 09:08 am (UTC)
Hahaha I have no idea what Walking the Plank actually means; that was just my first thought as I opened up a slash story on the site. :B I am done, universitycally speaking; I'm back Stateside and living with my parents. :X (My room is still an unpacked mess, for I seem to have slipped back into teenage habits.)

I guess, for me, what makes good fic is when someone can make me believe in the ship. Like, I have read some fics with some characters I could never even see interacting, and by the time I was finished reading the fic it was practically headcanon for me. I can very much see Flitwick/Snape being written well in a story, which probably means I already have (there are some super amazing writers out there).

I can see the 'asexuality' thing for Dumbledore, really...but that tends to be just one of those things that pisses me off about JKR's writing, so I try to ignore it. It seems as though she works hard to keep her teachers from ever really having sex-or-love lives in the story. (McGonagall's story is fairly similar, really.) She does this love-story-gone-wrong tragedy for them and then, boom, they're celibate and 'live for the children', so to say; I think that characters can live for the children and still have a good love-like-or-lick life. With that in mind, I tend to try editing my headcanon in cases like Dumbledore to get that tragic-first-love-and-never-to-love-again out and away. I know I've read fic with Dumbledore/Snape, and I'm sure that it was all very manipulative/not based on equality and integrity, but I also have a faint recollection that quite a few of them were brilliant pieces.

But all that said, given the reasons you've listed for Flitwick and Dumbledore, I can understand it to some degree; some characters will just never come off as sexual to some readers. That's understandable. Some of my friends manage to write Filch, somehow--while I will read and comment just for them, it's not something I would click on for anyone else.

(My friend reminded me that I missed Murial Weasley and Pomona Sprout--Sprout being one of my favourites.) The thing about the older female characters is that they don't tend to get much spotlight and the tend to end up known for their quirks (vulture hat, pipe, monocle, hawk eyes, complete obsession with the health of books, etc.). It's nice in a way, though, because it leaves the fic authors with nearly full-reign of the characters.

(I always wished Trelawney was less of a nutter too, and for similar reasons. Emma Thompson/Maggie Smith? Or Emma Thompson/Zoe Wanamaker? Yeah, my eyes don't mind that ooooone bit.)

My tastes are definitely getting broader with age in what I'll read--and occasionally write--but my strongest love seems to be sticking with older female characters for the long haul. :D
Lakela: snapelakela on September 5th, 2011 01:27 pm (UTC)
Sorry, back from work :D

I am done, universitycally speaking;
Ugh, I'm so jealous :D I had the horrible idea to begin another four year major as I was about to finish the first one and I'm still not done with either, but will hopefully finish this year (both of them).
But it's quite odd coming back from rehearsal and having to study bio-catalysis. :Z

I guess, for me, what makes good fic is when someone can make me believe in the ship. Like, I have read some fics with some characters I could never even see interacting, and by the time I was finished reading the fic it was practically headcanon for me. I can very much see Flitwick/Snape being written well in a story, which probably means I already have (there are some super amazing writers out there).

I absolutely agree. That's how I discovered Snarry, actually. I had a craving for Snape fic and (seeing as there are no Snape/Petunia or Snape/Bellatrix out there, which was what I set out for) I gave Snape/Sirius and Snape/Lupin and even Snape/Hermione a shot until I came across a Snape/Harry by an author who wrote Snape wonderfully. I quickly realized Snape/Harry actually made a lot of sense and when I read the novel "If you are prepared" they officially became my OTP. Not only did they make sense when a skilled author got their hands on them, they also brought out the most interesting aspects of each other. Seriously, Snarry has done a world of good in my consideration of Harry.

I can see the 'asexuality' thing for Dumbledore, really...but that tends to be just one of those things that pisses me off about JKR's writing, so I try to ignore it. (McGonagall's story is fairly similar, really.)

I agree about McGonagall being quite the same which is why I didn't set out to look for Snape/McGonagall in the first place. McGonagall is one of my favorite characters and my second favorite (tied with Bellatrix) in the movies, so I can try really hard for her sake, but I have a lot of trouble sexualizing the characters JKR has done such a thorough job of desexualizing.

I tend to try editing my headcanon in cases like Dumbledore to get that tragic-first-love-and-never-to-love-again out and away. I know I've read fic with Dumbledore/Snape, and I'm sure that it was all very manipulative/not based on equality and integrity, but I also have a faint recollection that quite a few of them were brilliant pieces.

Some Snarry fics that I've read hint at Snape/Dumbledore, but no matter how much I edit my head cannon, I have a hard time imagining a sexual relationship between the two. (Though I DO think their relationship is EXTREMELY interesting, not at a sexual level. What Dumbledore means to Snape is really quite complex...) The only time I thought, oh, ok! to Snape/Dumbledore was the fic that I linked to above. If you read it you'll see why. (It's a Snarry fic but if you have the time, I recommend it, it won't convert you to Snarry, but it's quite original and it's not long...)

It's nice in a way, though, because it leaves the fic authors with nearly full-reign of the characters.
Yes... (same with my favorite PotC character, James Norrington whose storyline has a lot of wholes.) At the same time, though, if they aren't important enough or played by an actress I had a previous crush on, I have a lot of trouble remembering them and then I don't enjoy the fics because the characters keep slipping from my mind. (as would happen with Flitwick. I just don't know who we're talking about. My memory is absolute rubbish.) So I need characters I quickly know who they are which is why I read fanfic in the first place (and usually don't care for OC).

Speaking of female characters: Narcissa is my latest discovery from the last film. I likezed her.

Bellatrix is a bit like Trelawney, in that she's completely bonkers. Except HBC completely sexualized her, so I suppose she makes for better fanfic than Trelawney, I still reckon it would be hard to find some depth into her character. (I keep hoping some skilled writer may have managed it)
Kiwi Crocuscranky__crocus on September 6th, 2011 06:04 am (UTC)
I'm grateful that I've never had any problem sexualising McGonagall, despite JKR's attempts in (secondary) canon to prevent that. I just found her too great to think that there couldn't be any sort of romance or sex in her life, especially as she was described as a middle-aged witch.

I guess I tend to just immediately glomp onto older female characters and look them up until I know them. After a few trips to the HP Wiki to remind myself who the characters are, I tend to remember them pretty well. I love the little characteristics I pick up about them from the books and love how fanon gives these characters (and the canon characteristics) this beautiful depth. Male characters tend to be the ones I'll forget. It hasn't so much been a case in Harry Potter, but to some degree even in that fandom... Though I'll still read fanfic about them. I read one fun fanfic about Dean (or Seamus?) being a drag-queen at nights (oops, there I go, forgetting which guy...).

HBC definitely sexualised Bellatrix, so I can see why that wouldn't be a problem. And, drat you, now I'm thinking about Bellatrix/Trelawney. I've definitely read some stories that gave Bellatrix some depth, but I don't think I remember them well enough to be able to find them. I hope you run across some good Bellatrix material some day!