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Kiwi Crocus
14 October 2035 @ 12:06 am

This is my winter song to you.
The storm is coming soon;
It rolls in from the sea.

My voice, a beacon in the night;
My words will be your light
To carry you to me.

Is love alive?
Is love alive?
Is love…

They say that things just cannot grow
Beneath the winter snow,
Or so I have been told.

They say we’re buried far,
Just like a distant star
I simply cannot hold.

Is love alive?
Is love alive?
Is love alive?

This is my winter song.
December never felt so wrong,
‘Cause you’re not where you belong:
Inside my arms.

I still believe in summer days;
The seasons always change,
And life will find a way.

I’ll be your harvester of life
And send it out tonight
So we can start again.

Is love alive?
Is love alive?
Is love alive?

This is my winter song.
December never felt so wrong,
‘Cause you’re not where you belong:
Inside my arms.

This is my winter song to you.
The storm is coming soon;
It rolls in from the sea.

My love, a beacon in the night;
My words will be your light
To carry you to me.

Is love alive?
Is love alive?
Is love alive?...

Winter Song by Sara Bareilles.

Current Mood: optimisticoptimistic
Current Music: Winter by Tori Amos.
Kiwi Crocus
22 February 2030 @ 10:32 pm
Telly!Collapse )
Current Location: Tellytown.
Current Mood: amusedamused
Current Music: Sunny Came Home - Shawn Colvin
Kiwi Crocus
01 January 2017 @ 12:00 am

Book List

Reading SuggestionsCollapse )

[Crossposted from dreamwidth.]
Kiwi Crocus
06 October 2016 @ 05:30 am
One more quick entry to say I just got my paid account/icon space back and

all my icons are back!


The pretty women and HP and The Worst Witch and rainbow and winter and adorable animals, all of them!

*Does a little happy jig*

Oh how I've missed them. All the years I've been on LJ, 6 was simply too few. Commenting didn't feel right somehow--I just stuck with the one muscly Halsey one and that was that. Now I have options!

But my best option is to go the fack to sleep. I think I'll always have a bit of trouble with that one...

*hoots like an owl and flies up her spiral staircase*
Current Mood: Sleepy but accomplished
Kiwi Crocus
23 September 2016 @ 08:08 am
Finally beginning to feel like myself again as of about 5 days ago! Have a lot of catching up to do after a year of being busy and a half-year of being very sick, with bad eyes to boot (screens were hard). Such a relief.

I'm Celiac on top of everything else. It's a whole lot of not-fun in America when I can't even risk cross-contamination, but I'm getting better at it. Learning the ropes of the kitchen and slowly gathering a set of kitchen supplies of my own.

Been hanging out with a younger friend of mine a lot recently who is also giving up gluten--she has had a very similar rash on her legs to the one I had and has had it for a very long time as well--so we're working on this together, which makes it easier. She's prepping for a colonoscopy so today we're making up a meal plan and shopping for it. I figure it's good for me too and helps support her. Platonic joint adulting!

I have come to be known as "Pups" in regards to my animals and some friends: not Mum, not Pa, but Pups. I am Head Puppin of the Mary Puppins establishment for training ourselves, each other and our pets into being our best selves. I've always kept a clutch of those younger than I in order to mentor and help along; now it's slightly more official: I do whatever I can to help my pups become the people they want to be and to feel comfortable in who they are; I teach emotional intelligence and communication skills wherever I can. I'm not a happy Pups when my pups get messed with, and those who do the messing tend to hear about it. ('Best selves' means knowing when to be an arsehole, and on the occasions that I actually get to be one, I probably enjoy it more than I ought...)

Recently there have been jokes about my being a referee, blowing a whistle and saying "foul!" or handing out yellow cards when I catch people being unkind. Looks like I may have to start wearing that Hooch hat more often.

Anyway, I'm going to get back to sleep. I conked out on the futon last night while working on my hoggywartyxmas sign-up (yup, I'm in!) and it's posted now, so I'll catch some Zs before my shopping adventure later today. (:

Hope you're all keeping well! I miss you dreadfully. What have you been up to? How are you doing? How have your hobbies been treating you?
Current Location: The Cubby under the Rainbow
Kiwi Crocus
29 July 2016 @ 02:26 am
My friend posted a link on my FB wall almost a year ago for library due date card neck-ties.

I am currently imagining Irma Pince wearing one of them (because I maybe have a thing for ties).

Just thought I'd share that alongside my tragic medical trauma.

Damn I would rock the shit out of one of those ties.

[Crossposted from dreamwidth.]
Kiwi Crocus
13 June 2016 @ 04:49 am
I disappeared again. My life has been a whirlwind descent from heaven into hell but I'm giving it hell right back; I'm more settled and steady in my skin than I have ever felt before (but dear gods does that skin hurt sometimes now my body skipped 26 for 87).

Today I heard about the Orlando mass-killing hate crime while I was at the retirement party of our 29-year minister the day after our own march in the Gay Pride parade. (I was one of 17 and the most visible of our group. When I passed a man on a soap box shouting hateful things I called out to a crowd of rainbow, 'We're gay happy sinners! Ecstatic! Happy sinning, Happy Pride!' with a Xena battle cry.)

My strong-ally brother read it to me and a long-time activist. My brother stumbled over a sloppy article and read 29 as the number dead. We gasped before he could correct that it was actually 50, and then we sat in horrified silence. 50. The deadliest mass shooting in my country's history and it was a hate crime during Pride, the worst terrorist attack since 2001. Latin night at a gay club. (The club I looked up and planned to go to the next time I was near Orlando.)

I saw a post from my Young Severus Snape friend (openly and quiet-proudly bisexual) on Facebook as I was scrolling tabs. He posted the 'Helper' words from Mister Rogers:

“When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, ‘Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.’ To this day, especially in times of disaster, I remember my mother’s words, and I am always comforted by realizing that there are still so many helpers - so many caring people in this world.”

He continued with an understated and effective comment namelessly chiding gun control, inspiring hope in the overwhelming number of helpers to every hateful crime and thanked those who are indeed helping:

"It's scary to think that one man can choose to end so many lives, and that it takes so many more people to keep those lives that were spared with us. When you see that so many more people are willing to give than there are those willing to take however, I urge you to give that space in your mind and to keep hope. My thoughts and nondenominational prayers are with the friends and families of those who are lost and those who have chosen this time to step up and do whatever they can to help."

I'm not there to give blood and, to be perfectly honest, am in no condition to do so. Physical health's not really my calling. I try to educate toward inclusiveness and awareness; I seek to comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable (as my dear Minister Emerita would say of ministry). Money is always needed--goodness knows how flawed our healthcare and citizenship programmes--but I am back to having distressingly little.

My friend also posted the link to the big Donation Page's gofundme:

Pulse Victims Fund run by Equality Florida that looks pretty legitimate.

I can't donate myself, at least not today; I will find at least something in my budget soon to give.

I know there's a history of writing festivals to raise donations after national disasters; I thought I could at least offer my writing.

Donate anything you can or want, even if it's the minimum (or even if you find the problem I have sometimes: your maximum is smaller than their minimum), and tell me what you'd like to see me write. Any idea you want done. Original, fandom; shipping, gen; any rating, any length, any setting and hell maybe even cross-overs. Tone, prompts, plotbunny--anything you want.

I have told everyone around me that this leadership-sabbatical summer of mine is for writing, reading, watching, and reconnecting. Here I go. (You can even make me read/watch something in order to write something.) These things will get done and you're unlikely to get a short drabble out of me (unless drabbles are what you want!).

There it is, then. I haven't got it in me quite yet to do up a whole community; I would gladly help anyone who'd feel the urge. I suppose I'll at least leave this post public in case people want to do honour system amongst friends.

I'll try to post again after tomorrow's vigil at one of the gay nightclubs in Providence. I have to go; I can't make most of RI Pride and I am drawn to rainbow like an elephant to booze (and I never forget that).

Until then, I hope you all are keeping safe and sound. What a day of suffering. May our departed be remembered as those brave souls lost to an act of hate, ignorance and prejudice; let it be a turning point for a future that arcs toward justice for queer/gay people (and for those of all demographics).

And may we remember them as we all do our best to survive and make positive change. May we do it with the weight of grief on our hearts but without losing our gay happy spark (for sinning) or our interwoven communities of support. (And may we have compassion for those who stay in the closet to whatever degree, because personal safety takes precedence.)

Now I'll step off from my soap box (I need it: I'm short) and catch a breath as I leave this to the other helpers.

[Crossposted from dreamwidth.]
Kiwi Crocus
06 May 2016 @ 07:46 pm
I am back in my little hobbit-hole for the evening much earlier than last night.

Currently wearing my Time-Turner, which means I need to get down to business on my to-do list, which I have been careful to pack with as much fun stuff as useful.

I'll be around all evening drinking port and getting up to stuff. It's a small bottle that may or may not make it to tomorrow, the poor dear.

Now I must end this post so I can go pour my first glass of port.

Feel free to join me!
Current Location: The Lakehouse [Petsitting]
Current Mood: Relieved.
Current Music: Day Dream - Sarah Vaughan.
Kiwi Crocus
01 January 2016 @ 12:00 am

Film List

    1) Tru Love directed and written by Kate Johnston and Shauna MacDonald. ****
    2) Camp Takota starring Hannah Hart, Grace Helbig, Mamrie Hart (who also produced it); really only 5* for fans of the online personalities, but since I am, I loved it. Bonus queer woman without it being a big deal. Played by a RL gay woman. *****
    3) Blazing Saddles directed by Mel Brooks. ***
    4) 12 Years a Slave directed by Steve McQueen. ****
    5) Big Hero 6 directed by Don Hall & Chris Williams. (Watched with my father.) ***
    6) The Host directed by Andrew Niccol and written by him and Stephenie Meyer (the writer of the original book). **
    7) Night at the Museum: Secret of the Tomb directed by Shawn Levy. **** [extra star for it including the final scene we'll get of Robin Williams]
    8) Despicable Me directed by Pierre Coffin and Chris Renaud. **** Julie Andrews voicing a character makes me smile.

[Crossposted from dreamwidth.]
Current Music: I Fall In Love Too Easily - Shirley Horn
Kiwi Crocus
01 January 2016 @ 12:00 am

Book List

Reading SuggestionsCollapse )

[Crossposted from dreamwidth.]
Current Music: Unforgettable - Nat King Cole
Kiwi Crocus
16 October 2015 @ 03:49 am
Dropping by quickly to report that I have been disgustingly happy.

Also horrifyingly behind on everything. I'll forgive myself, with the 4 jobs/day (down to 2 tomorrow and then DONE with the extras for a bit!), and intend to really devote myself to diving back in soon.

I am always incredibly grateful; gratitude is a skill I taught myself for noticing the big and little joys that make a heart feel less heavy.

I'm not sure I've ever in my life felt lucky.

And now I do.

(Not quite lucky enough that I feel it's worth buying a lottery ticket, but perhaps it might be a laugh to put in my scrapbook. A reminder never to let luck go to my head!)

I am up too late.

Lucky, then, but still not so much one for 'sensible'.

[Crossposted from dreamwidth.]
Current Location: The Cubby Under the Rainbow
Current Mood: lovedloved
Kiwi Crocus
19 April 2015 @ 03:49 pm
Today after service and after some youth business, I sat out near the sun again--next to a munching tortoise and a curious dog--and read. I read my books in a cycle unless they're one of my 'default' books (mostly those with a deadline, like book-club books); the first book in my currently-reading cycle is Leaves of Grass.

I feel bad to admit it, but it usually drives me crazy to read the thing. (Sorry, LoG fans!) Definitely not the fan of free-form poetry I was once upon a time, and Walt's earnest-white-man making O Endless Lists of Places, Vocations and States with patriotism, nationalism and sex-talk (not the sort of 'love spendings' that catch my interest) tends to bore me at best or irk me outright.

However, sometimes I hit the right poem at the right time, and it makes it worthwhile for me to be putting myself through the book just to say I've read it.

Today was one of those days: I was outside listening to the birdsong, admiring the sunlight and the budding plants, the hopping birds and the blue sky, when I read aloud 'Warble for Lilac-Time' for the first time.

In honour of (Inter)National Poetry Month (thank you, flist, for alerting me of this!) I thought I'd share it. I'm copy-pasting it from another site so I can't be 100% sure of its accuracy, but here it is:

Warble for Lilac-TimeCollapse )

I'm quite content to continue lagging. Now I'm thinking of one of my favourite flowering trees--Cercis canadensis, the Eastern Redbud--and its dark bark, purple buds, dark heart-shaped leaves. I'll leave you all with a picture of one from the Internet to keep up this feeling of spring.

Both the Muppet dogs wish you all 'hello' and also 'zzz' from the sofa they have taken over from me. Isn't it kind that they left me the final quarter of it for sitting? Such charitable creatures.

Much joy to you, my fellow warblers!

[Crossposted from dreamwidth.]
Current Mood: chipperchipper
Current Music: Our Love Is Here to Stay - Natalie Cole
Kiwi Crocus
04 March 2015 @ 11:57 pm
Random Post of Random Things!

  • A Charity Cause!

The Apparating Library

The above is a video from the HPA (Harry Potter Alliance) with their spokesperson/publicity person, who dresses up as an American-Accent Harry Potter. The HPA is a charity that works to educate, spread awareness, and raise money as part of Dumbledore's Army. One of the things they do is the 'Apparating Library'--described a bit in the video--to get books to underfunded, low-income areas and get kids reading/improve literacy rates. Right now they're raising money to have a library hosted in the Netherlands. There are also opportunities to donate books; I can search out some links for that if anyone is interested.

I just like the idea of an organisation harnessing the power of Harry Potter's message and fans in order to put it toward just, real-world problems. They've worked toward various goals in the name of equality, are currently working to get more young people (18-25) voting and learning to use their political power, and have raised some fairly significant money toward things like Kiva and other things. They created the first fair-trade Harry Potter Chocolate Frogs, actually, and petitioned to have Warner Brothers sell them as official merchandise in order to support fair-trade. And succeeded.

Just thought I'd share their current work, then, since we all tend to be fairly literary people and (from what I can see) approve of the general world population being more literate.

  • Drabbles!

So while searching for a link to my own fic a while back I found a drabble written for me by [personal profile] miss_morland that I didn't recall having seen before.

Mine is the second one here, called 'Butterfly'. Hot, sexy, funny, scientific all in 100 words. There is another one, called 'Fairness' for [personal profile] kelly_chambliss that was also quite impressive. Gave me the shivers. There is a second set of drabbles here that I actually haven't read yet myself. In case anyone else is interested in reading some lovely, short HP stuff that might have been missed! (It's from 2009 and 2010.)

  • Goodreads!

I love Goodreads. I wanted to share it--have for a while--because I think that, as literary people, a number of you might enjoy it as well. Do you enjoy 'book posts' from your fellow flisties and enjoy knowing what your flisties are reading? Making reading recs and chatting over books in common?

That's what goodreads is. It's kind of like Facebook for literary people, minus the privacy problems and more annoying status updates. It's addictive at first when one inevitably decides to go through many lists of books and put down which books one has read, or adding books to to-read lists, or whatever else.

After that initial 'mark down all the books!' phase it's a great way of keeping an accurate list of what one reads, sorting books into different virtual 'shelves' of your own creation (travelling spinsters? strong older female characters? queer women kicking ass? Call them as you see them), checking out what other people are reading, making recommendations to those on your friends list, updating how far into a book you are (if you feel like it; there's no requirement there), commenting on what others read, setting a 'book challenge' for the new year, entering contests for free books, leaving reviews and ratings for the books you read...

I love reading as a solitary act but also as a means for connection. Goodreads is the perfect place to do that: you've got your own little library arranged just the way you like it, and all sorts of virtual doors to yours friends' libraries and virtual common rooms for chatting all things books.

I'd love to see you all there! Let me know if you join up. (: I'm Kiwi and you may find there is already another familiar face on there--who knows!

That's good enough for now. I'm pretty exhausted after a long physical therapy evaluation appointment, a pointless trip to Target (they didn't have what I needed; and no, replacing Virgin Mobile phones with Sprint phones doesn't help me), and a meal + game of Dungeons&Dragons with my brother, his bestie Cmace, and Cmace's friend from Ohio.

(The physical therapist said she could, "see me for another hour!" if she didn't have another patient. She was also very impressed with how my body moves and how strong it is, which isn't something I get to hear often. She had me rest on my stomach as she went to type things in and that made me want to stretch, so I stretched my back up like the cobra stretch, and then I wanted to stretch more so I lifted my legs up like the basket stretch I used to do in dance. She turned around then and said, "You really are a marvel! I would never turn around and see another patient of mine able to do that." And equally she acknowledged that it's great that my body can do as much as it can, but it doesn't count for much if plain old living and moving causes me so much pain. I go back again tomorrow for my first full physical therapy appointment. I've already received one of the stretch-bands, so I know I'm on the right track. I think I'll go off and stretch with that a bit before I settle in for sleep.)

I hope you all are keeping well! I haven't heard much from you--my fault for not being here--and that makes me sad. Gotta keep on my game here and not let my exhaustion get to me. *Yawns, falls asleep at keyboard.*

[Crossposted from dreamwidth.]
Kiwi Crocus
17 January 2015 @ 04:54 pm

Sad picture, but not sad post. My friend from uni posted a link on Facebook: If Hermione Granger Were the Main Character in "Harry Potter".

Very compelling read (with images) in which Hermione takes No Shit, gives Zero Fucks, and tackles The Patriarchy (really truly), with tips of the hat to 'boss witch' Professor McGonagall (of course) and Ginny Weasley. (Molly too but I ignored that part because if a trope calls out a trope it's a double-negative and means the opposite, and the opposite of 'there' is 'not there', so there it's not.)

No really though it's hilarious. References to hashtag activism, some of the current goings-on in online feminist culture, calls out Dumblebore and Weasles and The Boy Who Lived But Died But Lived Again on some bullshittery and privilege...

It made me laugh. See what you think.

(This may be a posty day from me; I want to get up my resolutions and things. We'll see what happens after I manage to run some errands out in the cold: 22ºF/-5.6ºC yaaay... At least it's in the 20s? Serious scarf weather. Perhaps I should wear my Hufflrpuff scarf--and no that's not a typo, I have a cheap 'house scarf' that says Hufflrpuff, clearly not made by a Ravenclaw.)

Sail Escapism Seas.
n. A mental diversion to retreat from unpleasant realities through fantasy.

[Crossposted from dreamwidth.]
Kiwi Crocus
02 January 2015 @ 10:35 pm
There is a cat sitting on my hair. Damn it all, Boots, you have to pick the one place. I'll just sit here and keep reading while using you as a furry cat pillow.

This is the sort of thing I put up with in my household. Also, a Christmas tree with blinking lights that has one stupid blue bulb that won't blink in the right time or with any consistency and which drives me and my housemates/friends mad. There is additionally a persistent tortoise, 11 other creatures and a number of unconventional women of all shapes, sexualities and gender presentations living together.

Know what contains similar things?

My hoggywartyxmas gift story, The Cat, the Witch, and the Closet.

There are four comments' worth of squee from me there already. I did the maths, even, to see if I could calculate it into three comments, but it wasn't to be accomplished, so four there are! I figure if there's any time it's acceptable to give four comments, it's to one's own gift.

And what a gift it is. There's an organised, mostly-introverted, bookish, set-in-her-ways Irma Pince who is nonetheless willing to learn and adapt as life presents her with sound education and experience that inspire her to change her mind and ideas. It is brilliant to watch her learn throughout the story just as the topics she learns are equally brilliant: gender, gender presentation, passing, gender presentation and expression vs gender identity, sexuality, and *ahem* animal behaviour. Minerva is filled with good humour; Pomona is filled with life and love. That's three excellent characters already, and then there's a surprise thrown into the mix--one of my very favourite surprises.

So many of my favourite things. I've never been quite so pleased to feel like a combination of these (four) characters, as I often have; this story combines many of the ways my various identities and personality traits play out, as I think the author knows well, and I am grateful for that. I love knowing that the story was clearly written just for me; how lovely that feels. My heart is all full 'nd stuff. I am incredibly pleased with my gift!

I cut the other stories in the queue to get to this one, so I'll have to go back to where I properly am and work my way to the other Irma story I saw. It's hard to keep on track, you know, with so many housemates and critters to distract me! But I don't mind: an exciting house can be quite nice, don't you know.

[Crossposted from dreamwidth.]
Current Music: Housemate!Z playing video games.
Kiwi Crocus
01 January 2015 @ 12:01 am

ResolutionsCollapse )

Overall, as my first year with resolutions, not totally pants. I'll give it another shot.

[Crossposted from dreamwidth.]
Current Mood: hopefulHopeful.
Current Music: Stormy Weather - Etta James
Kiwi Crocus
01 January 2015 @ 12:00 am

Book List

Reading SuggestionsCollapse )

[Crossposted from dreamwidth.]
Current Mood: contentContent.
Kiwi Crocus
31 October 2014 @ 05:10 pm
I can't remember the last time I managed to read all fest creations in time. This year I managed it for minerva_fest, perhaps because I didn't write for it. There were so many excellent entries this year; I really do recommend them all in their own way (and did so with links on tumblr) but this year I'm going to shoot for getting down five official recs. I started out with 10 and had to carefully, fingers close to hair-pulling, make my way down to 5. So here they are:

  • Toy Soldiers - Fic - R - 3.3k

    I will admit that I didn't expect to like this one as much as I did--and I did quite a lot. It's written simply, but as I read I found that that only added to the power behind the big statements. (There are some amazing, gut-punching lines.) This piece follows the books; it journeys quickly from one to the other while still picking up on all the important pieces of the story. It's all from Minerva's point of view and is ripe to bowl a reader over with intense feelings. I cherish a look at the whole storyline from Minerva's POV as a teacher, as a fellow soldier, and as a person who was part of the war from before this set of children were born--before she had a hand in teaching them what they would inevitably become. This is a potent story and well worth a read.

  • Enough - Art - PG

    Just go admire this piece for a few hours, please, I implore you. It is one of the most exquisite pieces of fanart I've ever seen in any fandom: intricate details keep popping out at the viewer the longer one looks. Minerva is stunningly captured in a moment of fierce protectiveness and Neville is there in all his badarse BAMFery. This one goes down in the books!

  • The Bones of What You Believe - Fic - PG - 5.8k

    This story is excellent: the writing style, the story-crafting, the characterisation of every character, the grappling with beliefs and with the times... I love this merger of theological consideration, Harry Potter, and Minerva McGonagall. This story could absolutely convince me of Minerva's Pottermore backstory in how the story handled and presented it. It is not all happy-ending but is fulfilling in where it leaves Minerva and the reader. It has a strong female character (of course!), female friendship, mother/daughter and father/daughter relationships, and looks at how friends, family and acquaintances can impact a person's ways of seeing things. Read it!

  • Unbuttoned - Fic/Art - R - 4.7k

    Mmmm this is hot, adorable and lovely with a special treat at the end. Both Minerva and Wil are real charmers here. There's some natural hesitation and Wil in suits--what's not to love? The writing is lovely and the characterisation sparks a smile. Also, Pomona cameo! Well worth a read. Hot, well-written, well-characterised femslash always is. :D [Who would I be not to rec at least one piece of hot-as-hell femslash? (; ]

  • A Moment of Peace - Art - G

    This is a stunning piece of work. Minerva gets to kick back and relax on her one free morning and we, the lucky voyeurs, get to see it. Every little detail is impeccable and provides us with little extra pieces of the character that is Minerva McGonagall. Absolutely go take a look at it and leave a comment on this piece of brilliance!

    I was astonished by the level of artwork in this year's fest. It's all set to drool over!

    Now on to reading some spooky - sexy - scandalous Halloween Drabbles.

    [Crossposted from dreamwidth.]
    Current Music: Housemates getting ready for Rocky Horror.
    Kiwi Crocus
    17 September 2014 @ 12:15 am
    Today I rocked teaching. Wait, no, I taught about rocks. But same difference, right?

    I had all four kids today--one wasn't here last week--and we had a grand old time of bonding over zombies (during 'class meeting') and streams/frogs, imagining our forested hill as an ancient ocean, learning how rocks morph from type to type and move from place to place, and listening to the stones tell us how they'd like to be balanced in excellent rock sculptures (hint: 'wibble wabble fall' is rock for 'I don't want to be there!' or 'Haha balance gravity beat you'). Some of them worked together to make a faerie house and added a chimney for Old Saint Nick, which is thoughtful given it's September.

    This is only about two hours every week on Tuesday mornings, but it's at the Earth Center I went to Earth Camp at as a child--with the same wonderfully brilliant Dominican Nun. (If that gives you a certain image, let me rectify it: today she wore flared jeans, a black t-shirt under a flannel shirt, and talked about how much she wanted one of the teenager's very colourful socks with animals on them.) She's a joy to be around and is just as infectious now as she was when I was a little Luna Lovegood child.

    The committee meeting was less enthralling. The Board of Trustees has decided that any ministry-related groups are now to be referred to as "teams" rather than "committees". 'If we ask someone to join a committee, that doesn't make them want to do it now, does it?' asked my minister (paraphrased). 'But who doesn't want to join a team?' (Yeah, that should do it, thought I.) So I am now on the Worship Team (or "Worship Assistance Team"--dubbed "WAT" by yours truly, for I am the worst sort of person to have on a committee.)

    When I was walking out the door and explained that the upcoming lay-led service I have to coordinate with the team who went to General Assembly includes one well-spoken person and then Enthusiastic Environmentalist Who Beats Her Dead Horse of a Subject alongside Academic Knowledgeable Therapist Who Can Make Most Topics Boring And Long, my minister looked at me and said, 'I'll pray for you. I really will' with her devilish little grin. (Yeah, that should do it, thought I again.) She knows my trials and tribulations--but at least she gets paid for it, much as she might not be thrilled with the amount!

    Trying to keep things light at the moment. Spent most of the day with the lights low, stuck up in bed with a book and feeling unable to do much of anything. Tomorrow I have a meeting with a re-employment programme advisor I was assigned through the state (or "selected to participate in a re-employment program...") and I'm nervous. I've printed out my worksearch, resume and an example of my cover letter; my outfit is all set up.

    In that way I'm the closest to normal I've been in a while. I was able to do a nightly tidy-up (I've missed those but haven't had it in me), organise, take my vitamins, I'm making a post... I'm about to head off to meditate, jot a few things down in my journal and write up a quick list of things for which I am grateful, which will go in my gratitude jar. I'm on track to have 7 hours of sleep; I'll be lucky to get that on a nervous night but I usually start from a lower base than that.

    I'm glad this post came out more positive than the one that was forming in my head as I was driving home. It means pushing myself to follow my evening routine helped my mental state. I'll have to try my hardest to keep at it.

    Sweet dream, loves. I hope to be properly back soon.

    P.S. The kids had to take a picture of or draw a rock wall near their houses. One kid, with the nature name "Groot" (the things I let them get away with...), drew a pretty nice stone wall. With marshmallows on top. And a zombie eating them. Because last week we got to eat all-natural marshmallows at the end of the day and apparently there was talk of zombies. Anyway, I was handed that picture with the explanation of "It's a zombie eating marshmallows off a stone wall" and just about died laughing. That picture is now precious to me.

    [Crossposted from dreamwidth.]
    Kiwi Crocus
    20 August 2014 @ 11:05 pm
    I'm on holiday in Virginia--we drove down Saturday--and I've been up to nothing much.

    My life has plenty of News (yes, with a capital N) that unfortunately does not start with 'I got a new job', which is sad, but I don't feel like going into it because being on holiday is about escapism and relaxation.

    Instead I shall put up the questions I got from the Book Meme, which I wrote up yesterday but wasn't able to post due to short and random Internet problems in the one instant I was inspired to post it. Here it is now!

    The Book Meme - a few questionsCollapse )

    If any of you are curious about pictures and reading spots, let me know!

    Today I went swimming in the ocean. I came to the conclusion (as I do every year) that the ocean is wonderful and that swimsuits are a terrible torture. My mother said, "Your suit is just uncomfortable. Don't you have any good swim-suits?" "Yes!" I exclaimed, quite exasperated. "The one I was born in!"

    I am not sunburned--hooray for small miracles. Helped my brother make chicken fajitas, shocking everyone. Any other news-that-isn't-news? I think half the ocean's salt is in my hair right now. Very exciting.

    Back to doing pretty much fuck-all. Goodnight!

    [Crossposted from dreamwidth.]
    Current Location: Sandbridge, Virginia
    Kiwi Crocus
    30 May 2014 @ 06:27 pm
    For some reason I am choosing now to get some easy, not-mentally-taxing stuff done. Probably because I'm on a bit of a staycation at the moment!

    I wanted to post my Voyager thoughts for Season 5 so I can get on to watching Season 6. Just a bunch of rambles and squees and all that since I'm not there to watch it in person with queen_of_snapes (though I do hope to manage it on video/Skype one of these days as we've planned!). kelly_chambliss, you're also welcome to a scroll down memory lane as well. (; And of course anyone else from my LJ flist who likes the show and enjoys being reminded of it!

    I'm at the point now that I actually feel comfortable reading fanfic, so I've been doing that on occasion when I see my friends have written and posted it. If you have any recs please feel free to post them! I've also really been enjoying all the gifs on tumblr. Some are hilarious, some steal my breath away, some I just can't stop looking at. I'll put some down at the bottom.

    Now on to my ridiculous rambles (much like my fic comments):

    Star Trek: Voyager - Season FiveCollapse )

    My Feelings in GifsCollapse )

    That is all! Now I get to watch Season 6!

    [Crossposted from dreamwidth.]
    Kiwi Crocus
    30 May 2014 @ 05:40 pm
    I have survived thus far!

    To quote my tumblr post:

    This is the most flattering picture of me that has ever existed. Why? Because I have gauze sticking out of my mouth. (Ahaha I am so sick of the gauze.)

    The teddy bear is currently nameless. He's the rainbow gay!bear when-fandom-strikes won for me at a carnival because ze is the most charming mate-date around.

    I am drugged and chatting at Kiwi's Keep if you want to come join me! Just faffing about on tumblr and occasionally reading Dykes to Watch Out For.

    So that's Kiwi's Keep if you want to join me!

    You are also welcome to join me. (: Not that you'd ever expect sense from me anyway, but especially don't expect it from me today. Not when I've got a rainbow gaybear strangling me with love.

    He's decided to be useful and cover up my gauze problem for some real proof that I'm fine:

    [Crossposted from dreamwidth.]
    Kiwi Crocus
    18 March 2014 @ 01:32 am

    It was dentist day. For five years since my last appointment, it wasn't as bad as it could have been. Still deserves A Kiwi Face though.

    Mostly because I apparently have a very small mouth and that doesn't work very well when getting X-rays of teeth. My mouth has never been so unpleasantly full. Evil devices.

    Appointment included a cleaning. I wasn't expecting that since the website mentioned first meetings are just for check-ups and all. It was a pleasant surprise.

    Have to get my wisdom teeth out; I've known that since I was 17 but was busy getting my hip replaced instead. Dentist isn't pushing for extraction of my Big Cavity molar, but instead some pretty big fix-'er-up measures. Right now I'm down for an appointment on April 8th but I put myself down for the 'call in case of cancellations' list.

    Came home to play Dungeons & Dragons. Turned into a dragon, used my breath to turn four Storm Giants into stone--pretty frakkin' awesome.

    Knackered now. Been too long since I've been around these parts. Night!

    [Crossposted from dreamwidth.]
    Kiwi Crocus
    13 February 2014 @ 10:08 pm

    The end of Season 4 of Voyager caught me by surprise; I might not have noticed I'd entered Season 5 if I hadn't turned to the corner of my screen in time. I'm in-between a few big tasks at the moment and thought it was as good a time as any to dump my thoughts from much of Season 4 here, again mostly for queen_of_snapes. Since I sadly can't watch it with you in person, this is the closest I can get--for now! (Trust that the next time we see each other in person we'll be coming up with a list of the episodes we should watch together. You're welcome to join us, kellychambliss!)

    Of course I didn't think to start adding episode titles at the beginning of each new piece of commentary until halfway through. Ah well.

    I've also learned that tumblr is a treasure cove of fun Voyager things to explore. I picked an image based on my most recent thoughts...

    And here they all are!Collapse )

    [Crossposted from dreamwidth.]
    Kiwi Crocus
    06 February 2014 @ 01:29 am

    Snow day! Woke in my own time, bit past 12.30. Glad I can still manage sleeping past noon when I set my mind to it. (;

    Lounged around in bed reading for around four hours (no pants are the best pants). Did a rotation with all my books, reading a section of each with an extra section of my 'active' book (The Absolutist, for book club) in-between. For those curious: Tipping the Velvet, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (read gender-bent), The Ethical Slut, My Name Is Red (previous book club book I failed to finish), Youth Ministry Advising and The Highly Sensitive Person. Getting to just sit and read felt wonderful, as it always does.

    4 hours, in the grand scheme of things, is not actually that much time from a week. I wonder if I can convince myself to dedicate the time from one free leisure day a week, or at least split it into 2 hours over 2 days or even 4 hours over 4 days.

    Took my sweet time in everything. I think I expected that, though; yesterday I was super productive. I cleaned all my surfaces and even the walls before I went to work, had my committee meeting and then stopped by Target and the gas station to do other things I needed. (Failed to inflate the tyres because the gorram sodding bork-brained machine ate my money and the attendant could do nothing about it but state that she "really should go put a sign on it or something". Damn right you should! Do it, rather than adding it to a useless list of Shoulds!)

    Showered and my housemate cut 5-6 inches off my hair, which was long overdue. It was down past my butt and well along my thighs--I didn't even know it grew that long for me or that I might have the genes for it! Thought it'd have to stop at the bottom of my bum. It feels very short and manageable now despite still being at my tail-bone.

    Mostly got up to stuff while watching Voyager. It seems that finally meeting Seven (aslkdjfhglaskdfhg finally meeting Seven) has put me into a craze of constant watching, whereas before I was watching slowly and savouring. I'm pleased either way.

    Oh! The other day in meeting weekly summary examples came up, in regards to what had been sent to me and E earlier in the year and recently to A. I mentioned that one of the summaries that had been shared was one of N's from this year--one that included me. We discussed it and she made a comment about how far I had come along with my class, given what they were like at the beginning of the year when we tried to do a co-teaching activity too early. My class was incredibly difficult to manage then. Now we have our little blips but for the most part we do fine and we have our routine. It was wonderful to hear.

    Plenty of thinky-thoughts on this slow day today. I won't subject you to them all. I've been messaging with a few people on OkCupid and will be meeting up with someone next Tuesday. Been thinking a lot about why I seem to be the sort of person who doesn't crave those kinds of relationships or doesn't seem bothered about them either way--how I wouldn't mind reading in bed with someone else for 4 hours or having them putter about with whatever they do, but I am more than perfectly content to do it all on my own and in my own company. Happy, in fact. Relieved to not have to worry about anyone's feelings or needs but my own. Perhaps unapologetically selfish? I don't know. The world I am a part of doesn't seem to mention the people like me very much; fanfic sometimes does, characters on their own with more permanence or as a set-up for future romance. Trying to remind myself that if I would immediately say "live however you want--however makes you happy" to someone else then I must say it to myself as well; somehow it's always different to say it's all right for another and to give self-permission. That's the gist of my thoughts, anyway. That and Janeway's hair/face/shoulders/towel/not-towel. (Hey, there are some people I would give up the solitude for hands-down, and she wouldn't get the boot for spilling coffee in bed, either.)

    That's all from the Pipsqueak!

    [Crossposted from dreamwidth.]